Unexpected Financial Benefits of Gender Reassignment, and other headlines you may have missed

I've been busy recovering from the Kardashian thing, so I haven't gotten around to finishing a new blog post, but I have been collecting some good headlines.  Here are a few of my favorites from the last few weeks (with very minimal commentary!):

1) Reebok Loses $25 Million Law Suit Over Fitness Claims. 

It turns out they don't actually give you a better butt.

2) Holly Madison Insures Breasts for $1million.  

The article in People Mag says Hugh Heffner's girlfriend "took out the policy in order to protect herself and others in her Las Vegas show".  From what?

I wonder what type of insurance that is….. business equipment?  Can she depreciate her boobs over the years too?  Was Kim Kardashian's butt insured?  Did she wear Reeboks?

3) Toy Maker Mattel's Sales Up Sharply Due to Strong Barbie Sales.  

It's good to know that in a weak economy people can at least still treat their daughters to a toy that will give them a permanent inferiority complex.  I wonder if Mattel ever test marketed "Unemployed Barbie" or "Drowning in Student Debt Barbie" (but still smiling and beautiful despite her many disappointments) to reflect a contemporary female role onto which every young girl can project herself.  No?  

4) Statistics Indicate the Birth Rate Has Fallen in Down Economy.  

That's easy, no one feels like having sex when they lose their job/home/life savings.

5) Cheating on One's Spouse May Be On the Rise in These Tough Times.

After extensive research, they discovered that extra marital affairs tend to boost the egos of those who are not feeling good about themselves.  Go Figure.  

6)  Sex Change Surgery is Now Tax Deductible.

Just when you thought all the headlines were depressing, we finally get some good news about taxes!   The tax code is written to encourage certain behaviors:  Letting you write off mortgage interest subsidizes home ownership, letting you deduct charitable or retirement contributions encourages giving and saving.  So I guess maybe with this tax break, the government is encouraging gender reassignment.

So in summary, go buy your son a Barbie, because later, if he wants to realign his body with his inner gender identity, it will be tax deductible, and he can insure his new breasts so they don't hurt anyone.  And while the Reeboks won't help his butt, treating his "gender Identification Disorder" may make him happier, reducing his need to cheat on his spouse and making him want to have more sex even if he can't find a good job (although it may not increase the birth rate).

Do you have any favorite headlines or commentary to contribute?  I think you're supposed to click the little pencil icon.